Hajar is my firstborn child. When I was still carrying her, just like any other first mum, I was so obsessed with trying to come up with the most perfect name for her. I didn't want it to be too long or too short or too common or too different and it had to carry a significant meaning. That didn’t sound so hard, did it?
Well, after months of searching, I was still not able to find the perfect name I was looking for. I almost gave up and thought of just naming her after the doctor that delivered her. But then, on one fine day, I was reading a book about all the women that occupy an elevated status in Islam and I was really moved by the story of Hajar, the wife of Prophet Abraham.
It was not the first time I read about it. In fact, I have heard of Hajar’s story of survival many times before ever since I was a school girl. I think it gave me a different kind of impact reading it at that particular time because I was just about to be a mother and I could clearly imagine how it would feel like to be left alone in a barren desert with your newly born baby. My motherly instinct would kick in and I wouldn’t even have the time to think about myself as I frantically think of how my baby will survive the unforgiving harshness of the desert. As a refresher to most of us, let me share with you the first half of the hadith that narrates the story of Hajar.
Narrated Ibn Abbas:
“When Abraham had differences with his wife, (because of her jealousy of Hajar, Ishmael's mother), he took Ishmael and his mother and went away. They had a water-skin with them containing some water, Ishmael's mother used to drink water from the water-skin so that her milk would increase for her child. When Abraham reached Mecca, he made her sit under a tree and afterwards returned home.
Ishmael's mother followed him, and when they reached Kada', she called him from behind, 'O Abraham! To whom are you leaving us?' He replied, '(I am leaving you) to Allah's (Care).' She said, 'I am satisfied to be with Allah.' She returned to her place and started drinking water from the water-skin, and her milk increased for her child. When the water had all been used up, she said to herself, 'I'd better go and look so that I may see somebody.'
She ascended the Safa mountain and looked, hoping to see somebody, but in vain. When she came down to the valley, she ran till she reached the Marwa mountain. She ran to and fro (between the two mountains) many times. Then she said to herself, 'I'd better go and see the state of the child,' she went and found it in a state of one on the point of dying. She could not endure to watch it dying and said (to herself), 'If I go and look, I may find somebody.' She went and ascended the Safa mountain and looked for a long while but could not find anybody.
Thus she completed seven rounds (of running) between Safa and Marwa. Again she said (to herself), 'I'd better go back and see the state of the child.' But suddenly she heard a voice, and she said to that strange voice, 'Help us if you can offer any help.' Lo! It was Gabriel (who had made the voice). Gabriel hit the earth with his heel like this (Ibn 'Abbas hit the earth with his heel to Illustrate it), and so the water gushed out. Ishmael's mother was astonished and started digging.
(Abu Al-Qasim) (i.e. the Prophet) said, "If she had left the water, (flow naturally without her intervention), it would have been flowing on the surface of the earth.") Ishmael's mother started drinking from the water and her milk increased for her child. Afterwards some people of the tribe of Jurhum, while passing through the bottom of the valley, saw some birds, and that astonished them, and they said, 'Birds can only be found at a place where there is water.' They sent a messenger who searched the place and found the water, and returned to inform them about it. Then they all went to her and said, 'O ishmael's mother! Will you allow us to be with you (or dwell with you)?' (And thus they stayed there.)” [Reported by Bukhari]
Note that at first, Hajar gave the most common response any one of us would give at that situation. She got worried. But when her husband assured her that it was actually Allah that commanded him to do that, she became perfectly calm and composed. And that is the best self motivational tip anyone can give you to achieve the highest level of inner strength.
If you believe that the hardship you're about to face is actually destined by Allah, and that it is to gain the blessing of Allah, without doubts, you will have the absolute strength to face it with a full sense of submission to Allah. You know that Allah will be with you all the way and whatsoever is in store at the end of it, it is as wished by Allah and Allah knows best of what is the best for you.
I wanted my daughter to turn out to be as strong as Hajar, to be as submissive to Allah as Hajar, to be as determined as Hajar, to have a soul as emancipated as Hajar who did not depend on anyone but Allah to survive. And so I named my first daughter Hajar.
Well, after months of searching, I was still not able to find the perfect name I was looking for. I almost gave up and thought of just naming her after the doctor that delivered her. But then, on one fine day, I was reading a book about all the women that occupy an elevated status in Islam and I was really moved by the story of Hajar, the wife of Prophet Abraham.
It was not the first time I read about it. In fact, I have heard of Hajar’s story of survival many times before ever since I was a school girl. I think it gave me a different kind of impact reading it at that particular time because I was just about to be a mother and I could clearly imagine how it would feel like to be left alone in a barren desert with your newly born baby. My motherly instinct would kick in and I wouldn’t even have the time to think about myself as I frantically think of how my baby will survive the unforgiving harshness of the desert. As a refresher to most of us, let me share with you the first half of the hadith that narrates the story of Hajar.
Narrated Ibn Abbas:
“When Abraham had differences with his wife, (because of her jealousy of Hajar, Ishmael's mother), he took Ishmael and his mother and went away. They had a water-skin with them containing some water, Ishmael's mother used to drink water from the water-skin so that her milk would increase for her child. When Abraham reached Mecca, he made her sit under a tree and afterwards returned home.
Ishmael's mother followed him, and when they reached Kada', she called him from behind, 'O Abraham! To whom are you leaving us?' He replied, '(I am leaving you) to Allah's (Care).' She said, 'I am satisfied to be with Allah.' She returned to her place and started drinking water from the water-skin, and her milk increased for her child. When the water had all been used up, she said to herself, 'I'd better go and look so that I may see somebody.'
She ascended the Safa mountain and looked, hoping to see somebody, but in vain. When she came down to the valley, she ran till she reached the Marwa mountain. She ran to and fro (between the two mountains) many times. Then she said to herself, 'I'd better go and see the state of the child,' she went and found it in a state of one on the point of dying. She could not endure to watch it dying and said (to herself), 'If I go and look, I may find somebody.' She went and ascended the Safa mountain and looked for a long while but could not find anybody.
Thus she completed seven rounds (of running) between Safa and Marwa. Again she said (to herself), 'I'd better go back and see the state of the child.' But suddenly she heard a voice, and she said to that strange voice, 'Help us if you can offer any help.' Lo! It was Gabriel (who had made the voice). Gabriel hit the earth with his heel like this (Ibn 'Abbas hit the earth with his heel to Illustrate it), and so the water gushed out. Ishmael's mother was astonished and started digging.
(Abu Al-Qasim) (i.e. the Prophet) said, "If she had left the water, (flow naturally without her intervention), it would have been flowing on the surface of the earth.") Ishmael's mother started drinking from the water and her milk increased for her child. Afterwards some people of the tribe of Jurhum, while passing through the bottom of the valley, saw some birds, and that astonished them, and they said, 'Birds can only be found at a place where there is water.' They sent a messenger who searched the place and found the water, and returned to inform them about it. Then they all went to her and said, 'O ishmael's mother! Will you allow us to be with you (or dwell with you)?' (And thus they stayed there.)” [Reported by Bukhari]
Note that at first, Hajar gave the most common response any one of us would give at that situation. She got worried. But when her husband assured her that it was actually Allah that commanded him to do that, she became perfectly calm and composed. And that is the best self motivational tip anyone can give you to achieve the highest level of inner strength.
If you believe that the hardship you're about to face is actually destined by Allah, and that it is to gain the blessing of Allah, without doubts, you will have the absolute strength to face it with a full sense of submission to Allah. You know that Allah will be with you all the way and whatsoever is in store at the end of it, it is as wished by Allah and Allah knows best of what is the best for you.
I wanted my daughter to turn out to be as strong as Hajar, to be as submissive to Allah as Hajar, to be as determined as Hajar, to have a soul as emancipated as Hajar who did not depend on anyone but Allah to survive. And so I named my first daughter Hajar.
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